Monday, October 26th
I tried abstinence to stop acting out, but avoiding sex became yet another compulsive behavior.
Many of us have used the tool of abstinence to help break our cycle of sexually compulsive behavior. Those who suffer from our compulsion may find that experimenting with abstinence can help restore some stability and be an effective means of harm reduction in early recovery.
At first, we may feel a sense of relief that we have temporarily stopped acting out on our bottom-line behaviors. But this relief can fade if abstinence becomes a longer-term lifestyle that makes us feel empty and dissatisfied.
Other people seem to have healthy sex, but we may shy away from something so unfamiliar. Yet, we do not want to accept our current situation as the only path to sexual sobriety. Having sex with someone may seem desirable, but our fears about intimacy and connection can block us from seeking it.
As we work our recovery, we may find that using the Tools and working the Steps can provide some spiritual insight. We can embrace self-acceptance and learn to love ourselves while showing compassion for others. By practicing honesty, openness, and willingness, we may embrace intimacy, which can help us explore and experience healthy sexuality.
I have intimacy in my life and in my sexuality.