Monday, August 10th
I attended meetings every day and was no longer acting out. But I still felt empty.
In our active sexual compulsion, we often used sex to escape from our feelings and to repress anxieties or other intense thoughts. For many of us, our compulsive acting out became almost a ritual. Our desire to avoid feelings drove us to embrace a sense of living on autopilot. We did what we did because we always did it that way, but we felt a growing emptiness, a “hole in the soul.”
This void in our lives contributed to our shame and made us more likely to dismiss the value of any spiritual way of life.
As we recover from sexual compulsion, we may find the courage to face these intense thoughts and feelings. Through working the Steps, we learn that a spiritual change means more than just stopping certain harmful behaviors.
By developing trust in our Higher Power, we can expand our lives. As we forgive our past, we can start loving ourselves and develop compassion for others. Through acceptance, we become more open to friendship and intimacy. With our Higher Power and our community of recovering sexual compulsives, we may live more fully and use our energies well.
We will discover ourselves, our spirituality, and our connection to our Higher Power.