February 22nd Meditation: Shifting Negative Attitudes

Saturday, February 22nd

I had no idea what my emotional needs were.

As sexual compulsives, we often had difficulty processing our feelings and turned to compulsive sex as a coping mechanism. While sex seemed like the perfect antidote for these feelings, it could not address the underlying conditions that made us want to escape them in the first place – insecurity, trauma, pain, and fear. Sex gave us a temporary euphoria, a false sense of satisfaction. However, after the effects wore off, the shame around our behaviors compounded our sense of low self-worth.

“After every sexual encounter, I always found the same dark feelings of shame. It was one demoralizing experience after another.”

As we attend meetings, we hear others share their experience, strength, and hope. The details of our stories differ, but we start to identify with the feelings underlying our compulsions, and we learn to shift from negative attitudes toward a new way of living.

By working the Steps and using other recovery tools, we find the courage to face our feelings rather than repress or try to escape them. We can let go of our shame and learn to show compassion for ourselves and others.

We will seek spiritual progress, not perfection. 

February 21st Meditation: Romantic Obsession and Love Addiction

Friday, February 21st

We tended to become immobilized by romantic obsessions. We became addicted to the search for sex and love; as a result, we neglected our lives.

For some, our tendency to objectify and romanticize others became compulsive. We lost ourselves in fantasies involving people we envied, admired, or found physically attractive. The exhilaration we initially experienced overwhelmed us, and we became obsessed.

“Eventually, my only tool for survival was my sex and love addiction, until my entire focus was on the search for anonymous sex and unrequited love.”

During periods of romantic obsession, many of us set aside or even ignored our other relationships. The intense infatuation became our top priority: endlessly fascinating, often painful, and always urgent.

By using the SCA Tools of Recovery, we find hope. Gradually, we begin to change our behaviors and find self-awareness and self-acceptance. We experience our feelings fully, without the compelling need to escape them. We learn to separate fantasy from reality in our relations with others.

“I learned that healthy relationships grow in stages involving a different set of skills and level of surrender. I prayed to be more open to healthy intimacy and then took action to make myself available for that possibility.”

My sexual recovery program gives me clarity and tools for living life in better, more fulfilling ways.

SCA Daily Meditations e-book now available

Our Journey of Recovery: SCA Daily Meditations is now available in e-book format through Amazon Kindle, Apple Books, and Google Books for $7.99. We will continue to post today’s (and tomorrow’s) meditation for free on our website each day. However, e-book users can click the “List of Titles” (an index) on each page to choose any topic or issue mentioned in any part of the book and instantly click the relevant texts. A slogan index is also linked to those texts. SCA plans to produce a print version of this book later this summer. Here are the links to the three e-book platforms.

Apple

https://books.apple.com/us/book/our-journey-of-recovery/id6503449662

Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0D5N3ZFNY/ref=kinw_myk_ro_title

Google

https://play.google.com/books/reader?id=Tw4LEQAAQBAJ&pg=GBS.PT1