Thursday, February 20th
I passed a cute couple kissing on a street corner and thought, “I’ll never have that.”
In constructing our sexual recovery plan, we look for relief from the actions, people, places, and things that have made our lives unmanageable. We also list conditions and activities we may categorize as “gray areas.” We may become triggered by feelings that pull us toward compulsive behaviors. Such feelings may be driven by our senses or by events.
Some of these triggers could include family issues, work-related stress, seeing a gorgeous person on the street, or simply boredom — feeling at “loose ends.” Perhaps we might react by fantasizing about the person we just saw and then turning toward ways to recapture that moment or feeling. Often, these triggers throw us off balance, and our lives suddenly feel chaotic and unmanageable. Our attention is drawn to places we did not mean to go. We may experience euphoric recall over past sexual experiences or fantasies.
While we do not need to blame ourselves for feeling triggered, we also do not need to give in to our compulsion. Part of our spiritual recovery is the ability to let go of pursuing those things we do not need and cannot possess.
Practicing affirmations and using the “three-second rule” keeps me from straying into fantasy.