Wednesday, December 4th
I am trying to control my acting out, but I can’t stop slipping.
In our compulsion, many of us believed we were destined to continue our endless cycle of sexual acting out. Even if we were aware that sex was not the long-term solution to our problems, we still turned to it for temporary relief and escape.
In recovery, we hear that we can work the Steps and use the Tools to achieve a personality change that will help us move away from sexual compulsion. At first, this may sound unrealistic or even delusional.
SCA is a spiritual fellowship. We cannot control or force change; most of us have tried that and failed. As we listen to others share their experience, strength, and hope, we may acknowledge that recovery is possible. By trusting in a Higher Power of our choosing and through the support of other members, we can let go of the need to control our compulsion. This shift in our attitude is a process of acceptance.
Acceptance gives us the freedom to replace our harmful behaviors with healthy, affirming ones. We practice self-compassion and pass on these gifts by helping others.
Our ability to do, feel, and believe things previously impossible for us is a sign that our spiritual life is expanding.
When I trust my Higher Power, I have a daily reprieve.