Currently before NY Intergroup is a document that details, among other things, suggested guidelines for SCA meetings. David N. has compiled these guidelines from past NY Intergroup Minutes. It is the intention of NY Intergroup to adopt these suggestions as a 'living document (ie., an ongoing, updated record of non-binding suggestions for the conduct of meetings based on the experience, strength and hope of the members of SCA'. The suggestions (all but the last one) have been appended with a commentary (Paul B, Orison A, Rob W, Daniel M contributed to this, along with David N).
Intergroup is not a governing or ruling body (Traditions 2,9). Each meeting is autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or SCA as a whole (Tradition 4). Thus groups are free to make any and all decisions regarding their structure, conduct, scheduling and individual focus as long as they do not violate the 12 Traditions or harm other groups or SCA as a whole.
However, as SCA has grown and evolved, much wisdom has been gained by recovering addicts about processes which further recovery and those which can be destructive to SCA unity. The following is a list of suggested guidelines for individual meetings to draw upon when seeking such guidance. The principle of "take what you like and leave the rest" should be considered to apply to ALL the items on this list.
The first suggestion that Intergroup develop a list of non-binding
suggestions for meeting formats and guidelines was documented in the
Intergroup minutes of February 15, 1985. A committee was formed, but no
evidence is available that such a list was ever compiled. However, many
references to such suggestions are contained in the Intergroup Minutes.
Citations to these minutes appear in the list as (I.M.
A. It is suggested that the Opening Statement from the fourfold be read at
the beginning of the meeting, and the Closing Statement just prior to the
end of the meeting. Commentary: Reading the Opening Statement and Closing
Statement at the beginning and end of each meeting sets the tone and reminds
members what SCA is all about. It explains the purpose of the program and
outlines a framework for recovery.
B. It is suggested that each meeting have a chairperson, a treasurer and a
literature person as officers, with a commitment to serve the group
consistently over their term. Commentary: Having regularly attending
officers at a meeting provides structure and allows members to focus on
recovery issues rather than business issues.
C. It is suggested that meetings set their own boundaries by group
conscience as to the use of graphic language in shares, and that such
boundaries be stated as part of the meeting format. It is further suggested
that unless allowance of graphic language is specifically adopted as part of
the meeting format, that members refrain from graphic descriptions during
shares that might be triggering to others. (I.M. 7/27/86, 8/13/89)
Commentary: The use of graphic or sensational language in meetings can be a
trigger for many addicts to act out. However, some addicts in recovery find
that they need to say exactly what is coming up for them around their sexual
issues. By taking a group conscience on the use of such language and
announcing it as part of the meeting format, members can set their own
boundaries and choose whether they wish to attend such a meeting.
D. It is suggested that meetings discourage members from naming specific
acting-out places during shares (this would include the use of proper names,
street numbers, and "on-line" addresses). (I.M. 8/13/89, 2/16/97)
Commentary: The naming of specific acting out places by proper name or
address can be triggering for many addicts, and may also lead them to act
out in new ways and in places. Refraining from the naming of these places
in open sharing can be a conscious choice to move toward recovery, as well
as simply a courtesy to other addicts for whom this information would be
potentially damaging.
E. It is suggested that meetings set their own boundaries in discouraging
"cross talk". While "cross talk" is difficult to define, it may include
speaking aloud while someone else is sharing, commenting directly on, or
criticizing what someone else has shared. It is suggested that group
chairpersons encourage members to focus on themselves in sharing, or on
identification with the qualifying speaker, if the meeting has one. (I.M.
1/19/86) Commentary: In recovery we are encouraged to keep the focus on
ourselves. The use of critical or shaming language toward others in
meetings is destructive of a safe environment in which to share. As active
addicts, secrecy, guilt and shame were usually very much a part of our
addiction. Having the safety to share our secrets without fear of overt
judgment is a tool of recovery. Directly referring to the shares of others
can be threatening to many addicts who fear such judgment, even if the
reference is merely to identify with the person sharing. However,
identification with speakers at meetings may be beneficial. These members
have volunteered to do service by sharing their experience strength and
hope, and allowing for identification is a way of encouraging others in
their recovery.
F. It is suggested that meetings set their own boundaries by group
conscience as to the agreed upon length of members' shares. In the absence
of timed shares, it is suggested that group chairpersons encourage members
to voluntarily limit the time of their shares so that as many as possible
who wish to share may do so. (I.M. 9/29/85)
G. It is suggested that the chairperson of each meeting be responsible to
adhere to the agreed upon format for the meeting, and that the format only
be changed during a business meeting on the basis of a group conscience.
(I.M. 7/27/86) Commentary: This is consistent with Tradition 2, that says
there is only "one ultimate authority" as far as our group purpose is
concerned, that is, "a loving God as He may express Himself in our group
conscience". If the chairperson were to deviate from the agreed upon format,
then he or she would be assuming too much authority, like someone who
governs. Instead, Tradition 2 says our leaders are "trusted servants." By
following the agreed upon format, the chairperson is serving the will of the
group and not his or her own agenda.
H. It is suggested that chairpersons discourage announcements not related to
SCA from being made during SCA meetings. (I.M. 11/17/85) Commentary: This
suggestion reflects several traditions, including 5, 6 and 10. According to
Tradition 5, the primary purpose of each group is "to carry its message to
the sexual compulsive who still suffers." SCA-related announcements are
inherently geared toward the primary purpose; non-SCA related announcements
are not. Also, an SCA meeting offers addicts an oasis from the outside
world; bringing in non-SCA announcements would be an intrusion into that
oasis. Non-SCA announcements during meetings might also suggest that the
group endorses an outside enterprise (in violation of Tradition 6) or give
the impression that SCA has an opinion on an outside issue (contrary to
Tradition 10).
I. It is suggested that groups hold periodic business meetings, and that any
group consciences taken during these meetings be recorded and retained for
future reference. It is further suggested that each meeting document its
meeting format, specifying such things as the literature to be read, the
presence/absence of a break, timed shares, etc. (I.M. 1/19/86) Commentary:
Experience shows that if group consciences and meeting formats are not
written down, over time they are quickly forgotten. Once they're on paper,
however, it's easy to transfer the information from out-going officers to
incoming officers. This makes it easier for new officers to fulfill their
duties and maintain the consistency and integrity of a meeting, as well as
save time by avoiding the need to take new group consciences on decisions
already made in the past to the group's satisfaction.
J. It is suggested that each group elect an Intergroup Representative for a
suggested term of one (1) year. It is further suggested that this person
have a substantial amount of time in program (90 days minimum, 6 months
preferable) and make regular reports to the group about Intergroup
activities. (I.M. 9/25/88) Commentary: Intergroup Representative is an
important position because it keeps autonomous groups connected through the
collective body of Intergroup. The term of one year is suggested because it
allows for consistency at Intergroup, which often takes many months to make
decisions. And since Intergroup generally meets only once a month, the
service is not considered much more taxing than other positions, which
require weekly appearances at meetings for 3 to 4 months. The 90-day to
6-month requirement is recommended because Intergroup makes decisions that
could potentially affect the entire fellowship, and members with less than
90 days are not likely to be informed enough about program to help
substantially in making those decisions. It is also crucial that the
Intergroup Rep. report back to the meeting he or she represents; in this
way, he or she is a true representative by keeping the group informed and
also fielding the group's questions and opinions, so that these can be
communicated back to Intergroup.
A. It is suggested that persons elected to perform the duties of Treasurer
have a substantial amount of time in program (90 days minimum, 6 months
preferred), and be known by the group to be reliable and responsible. (I.M.
7/27/86, 9/28/86) Commentary: Tradition 5 states that each group's primary
purpose is to carry the message to the sexual compulsive who still suffers.
Part of that mission is for each group to continue to exist, and responsible
attention to financial matters is an important aspect. In addition,
newcomers to the program are often unsure about their commitment to the
fellowship, and need to be allowed to make their own determinations about
whether they belong, without the pressure of a service commitment. Having
the financial and business needs of the group handled by a regular member
also fosters the sense of safety so important to recovery.
Although all officers at a meeting have important responsibilities, the
treasurer's job is unique in that 1) it involves the handling of money,
sometimes large sums; and 2) it usually requires contact with people outside
the meeting (i.e., the person collecting rent on the meeting space, the
Intergroup treasurer, etc.) As such, it is important that the treasurer be
accountable to the group, so that his or her handling of the money can be
monitored. Since for many addicts, irresponsibility with money plays a role
in their disease, the temptation to mishandle money may prove tempting,
especially for newcomers. It has happened that both newcomers and old-timers
alike have taken a meeting's money, leaving the group unable to fulfill its
financial responsibilities and placing it in jeopardy of losing its meeting
space. It is essential, therefore, that the treasurer be someone known to
the group so that at the very least peer pressure and the knowledge that he
or she will be held accountable will keep him or her on a responsible
course.
B. It is suggested that group treasurers send 10 percent of gross
collections or $5.00 (whichever is larger) to SCA Intergroup, provided that
the meeting is financially sound (i.e., able to meet its rent expense and
continue as a meeting). (I.M. 3/6/88, 12/10/89) Commentary: The suggested
donation to Intergroup is in keeping with Tradition 1 that "our common
welfare should come first"; personal recovery depends on SCA unity.
Intergroup is a collective committee of representatives from individual
meetings, and consequently focuses on matters that affect SCA as a whole.
Production of the meeting list, 12th step outreach work, the annual
conference and production of new literature are just some of the functions
that Intergroup performs. Without the financial support of the fellowship,
these important aspects of recovery would not be possible. SCA Intergroup is
the vehicle by which SCA groups can act in unison on matters affecting the
entire fellowship, and the donation to Intergroup reflects the importance of
having an organization to oversee collective concerns.
C. It is suggested that group Treasurers maintain a "log book" recording
collections and expenses and pass this record on to following Treasurers.
(I.M. 9/28/86) Commentary: Keeping regular records is consistent with
maintaining rigorous honesty, an important aspect of recovery. It also
provides a framework for other group members to see how the financial
affairs of the group have been handled in the past, so that these practices
can be continued.
D. It is suggested that group treasurers make regular reports to their
groups, particularly if the meeting is in dire financial straits. (I.M.
9/28/86) Commentary: This suggestion is in keeping with the principles of
honesty and openness, as well as the need for groups to remain solvent in
order to continue their primary purpose. It is particularly important that
this information be shared with the group in the event that there is a
problem with making the meeting's rent. By regularly letting the group know
the state of its finances, timely efforts can be made to bolster support for
the meeting, or find less expensive space for the meeting location. Regular
reports also help support Tradition 4 by underscoring a group's autonomy and
highlighting Tradition 7 by demonstrating that the group is "fully
self-supporting, declining outside contributions." Also, as full disclosure
about our addictions moves us along in recovery, so full disclosure of a
meeting's financial state can help a meeting maintain a sound financial
footing. For groups in dire financial straits, a regular report may also
have the beneficial effect of enhancing contributions and thus putting the
meeting on a sounder financial footing.
E. It is suggested that group Treasurers transfer a description of their
duties (process of paying the rent, donation to Intergroup, recording of
collections, conduct of the Treasurer's break, etc.) to the next Treasurer
following an election. (I.M. 9/28/86) Commentary: Following this
suggestion serves the group's continued existence and continuity. In the
absence of written guidelines, this "hand-off" is very often the only
transference of group conscience regarding the meeting's financial dealings
with the outside world. Also, in keeping with Tradition 2, meeting leaders
are "trusted servants; they do not govern.'' As such, each treasurer is not
expected to put his or her individual stamp on job, but to humble themselves
by following a uniform and efficient process. Codifying the process leaves
in place the "principle'' of handling the money by eliminating the
"personality."
A. It is suggested that chairpersons or treasurers who conduct elections
allow opportunity for ALL volunteers and nominations to be made before
closing the floor to further volunteers or nominations. It is further
suggested that specific mention be made that persons can nominate themselves
or others. (I.M. 10/4/87) Commentary: Tradition 12 reminds us to "place
principles before personalities." The principle at stake in elections is
fairness to all members who may wish to use the tool of service. Allowing an
appropriate time for the floor to be open, and specifically asking for
further nominations or volunteers gives members a chance to consider the
opportunity for service. Elections by acclamation immediately after someone
volunteers can be seen by newcomers as a "personality" issue, (i.e., someone
is more popular) and therefore is being elected. Some small meetings may
have difficulty in getting members to perform vital services, and therefore
any volunteer is considered to be the presumptive officer. In general,
however, it would be appropriate for the current chair or treasurer running
the election to ask if there are any other volunteers or nominations before
affirming the election of the only candidate.
B. It is suggested that prior to opening the floor to volunteers or
nominations for each position that the current holder of each position give
a brief outline of the duties involved in the service commitment.
Commentary: This process allows members to become familiar with the duties
of the position. It is also sometimes the only means of passing on the
procedures of running the meeting in the absence of a written format.
Furthermore, it allows more time for members to consider whether they wish
to volunteer or nominate someone.
A. It is suggested that meetings set their own boundaries by group
conscience with respect to how much time someone qualifying at the meeting
should have on his/her sexual recovery plan. (I.M. 10/13/91) Commentary: The
function of a speaker/qualifier at an SCA meeting is to allow the assembled
group to share and find identification with the experience of recovery.
While every member of the group is equally important and everyone has
valuable experience about his or her addiction to share, the speaker should
be someone who has current experience about recovery to share as well.
Taking this example to an extreme, many members of the fellowship might
prefer not to listen to the qualification of a person who had been acting
out directly before coming to the meeting to speak. The appropriate time to
listen to a member in such circumstances would be during open sharing. It
is useful and helpful to the recovery of all to have set guidelines on the
amount of time a person needs on his or her plan so everyone in the group
knows they can expect to hear about "How It Works" when they come to a
speaker meeting. This is a one-day-at-a-time program, and all any of us has
is today, but since long-term sobriety is one of the goals of the program,
it is beneficial to recovery to have it reflected in those who speak.
B. It is suggested that speakers be selected to share their experience
strength and hope, and above all, their recovery. Commentary: Speakers
should be encouraged to keep the focus on their problems with sexual
compulsion/sex addiction, although they may bring up their experience in
dealing with other addictions, other issues, and other recovery programs as
they relate to their recovery in SCA. Speaking is a form of service, and
speakers are encouraged to keep in mind that an important aspect (if not the
most important thing) about a qualification is that it is a form of Twelfth
Step work, through which the speaker is carrying the message and reaching
out to the still-suffering sexual compulsive/sex addict in the rooms,
newcomers, people just coming back, and people struggling with the
compulsion to relapse. As such, the qualification needs always to be more
than a personal gripe session or opportunity to vent. That is not to say
that sometimes a speaker will not express feelings around issues that he/she
is confronting at that very moment. We are only as sick as our secrets, and
keeping things bottled up in a qualification won't do anybody any good.
Speakers should always be encouraged to remember to tell the group: what it
was like when they were acting out; what happened to bring them into
recovery and the Program; and what it's like now. Focusing on their life in
recovery and how they stay sober one day at a time (e.g., going to meetings,
staying on their recovery plan, keeping a day count, having a sponsor and
sponsees, doing service, etc.) is also a reminder of how the program works.
A. It is suggested that meetings which identify themselves as "Beginner's
Meetings" make some explicit efforts to welcome and provide support for
beginners. Some suggestions from those currently in use include: the
regular presence of a literature person with a full supply of literature;
the reading of a prepared statement addressing the specific fears and
concerns of newcomers; acknowledgment of the presence of newcomers; specific
sharing time reserved for newcomers; an interim sponsorship coordinator; or
the inclusion of a social break to encourage regular members to talk to
newcomers. Commentary: Having written guidelines for "beginner's" meetings
can be very helpful in a program that relies heavily on an oral tradition to
pass along the structure and guidelines for chairing meetings and running
treasurer's breaks. This is a particularly important point because many
meetings have officers who are quite new to the program, and may not
remember all the elements that need to be covered in their remarks to the
group-or fully realize the reason why each element is important. The
presence of a consistent structure is particularly important for beginner's
meetings which very often provide the first impression of what SCA is about.
While there should always be enough flexibility in a meeting format to allow
the chair and treasurer to be natural and to "own" the greetings and
messages they are giving to the group, there also needs to be enough
structure and organization to ensure that the meeting continues to serve its
intended purpose
A. It is suggested that group chairpersons be empowered by their groups to
maintain the boundaries set by group conscience. This includes the use of
discretion when a member becomes abusive or threatening (physically or
verbally), presents a hazard to the other members of the group by creating a
hostile environment, or refuses to respect the group conscience.
Chairpersons or individual group members are encouraged to call for a group
conscience where such a situation exists and may vote to exclude such
person(s) from their meeting. It is suggested that groups balance the 1st
and 3rd Traditions in reaching a decision on such a situation.
I. General Notes on Meetings
II. Notes on Financial Issues
III. Notes on Elections
IV. Notes on Speakers
V. Notes on Beginner's Meetings
VI. Special Concerns